I know that after being in an abusive situation, mentally, physically doesn’t really matter, you lose a lot of yourself. Remember, the person that use to laugh all the time and tell jokes, or the person who was always so cheerful and encouraging? I will never forget one time, about a year after leaving my husband when I was at a friends and we were just talking and laughing and she said, “It is so nice to see the old Becky again.” I almost cried, actually chances are I did cry. She was a gal that had known me since I was fifteen and for years she had wondered where her old friend had gone.
Back to what must have been my point: just as your self esteem and dreams were taken one day, one word, one punch at a time, it will come back one day, one word, one hug at a time. Start simple, baby steps. Take an index card, sticky note of piece of paper and write down the 3 most important things you want to change or to have in your life right now.
For example, mine were initially – stop the anxiety attacks, build my self esteem, find a job I love.
Now post this in a location that you will see several times a day. I suggest the fridge and the bathroom mirror. I see both of them often. The bathroom is great because it gives you those few moments when you are brushing your teeth or washing your face to read them and think about them. Then throughout the day you will be focused on those 3 top goals.
Now, even if you don’t do anything for a bit that is fine, remember, baby steps. Just having them as a thought is the seed that you want to plant. Then in a week or so sit and write down why you want each one of them in detail. No one else will read this so don’t hold back. Put what you will lose if you don’t have the goal and what you will gain if you do.
Most important, if you do nothing else, post these 3 goals and read them daily. Remember the past does not equal the future, so start today to make your future, you dream!
Lots of love and well wishes. You are never alone, you are thought of often. I really want you to succeed and see that being abused should never define you, but it will if you let it.
I have included my Focus Poem for you: Read this poem 2 times fast then one time slow, it will get you to focus. The entire poem is in the post just below this one or for the entire poem suitable for framing click the link below. To purchase the poem on gifts go to blogroll and click on Dream Focused Store.
Love & Peace Baby,
Rebecca J. Burns