I received the following comment from a young man that came to the site recently. He wrote the following:
My name is J. i have recently became a domestic abuser. please don’t automatically judge me. i think the fact that im actually texting on this site shows that im a good person. i just make bad choices because of my anger issues. anyway, i hit my girlfriend once on two different occasions. although both times i was hit first, i still didnt have a right to hit her. i just reacted after i was hit. i need advice. i know i need counselling. i really love this girl & i dont know what to do. i know we might not get back together & im prepared for that. i just need my best friend back. i would kill myself right now if i knew it would get her to forgive me. thats all i want. please give me some advice. i dont know what to do & i dont have anyone to help me. thats why i went searching for this site. please treat me serious & answer me as soon as possible. im really lost right now & i just cant stop crying. o & please dont take my message as if im going 2 commit suicide.
I responded with what I could, telling him that he must deal with his anger and offered some resources. Most that I have spoken with that have anger issues lived in some type of abuse as a child, went through something that causes this anger.
I have a link on the site to Family Violence Intervention Program
Please share what you will in support of this young man, as I said, violence must stop with the abuser, how else? If you have managed to calm your anger and want to offer first hand advice to the young men and women out there please do so now. Do you run a site that supports those dealing with anger issues? What books can you recommend?
We all have a role in stopping violence. Let’s start with this young man.
Love & Peace,