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I had to re-post this today, my now 27 year old son sent me a photo of my 5 year old grandson, he had a big smile on his face while holding a book mark I had made with this poem on it with a baby on the top with wings. When my son told him grandma made this he was like, wow. He loved the poem, too cool. My daughter and I have now turned this into a song, with her amazing voice, this will take on a new life. Crazy how something wrong 27 years ago, that I did because I didn’t know any nursery rhymes is still part of our life, gotta love the little things.

The Last Straw

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Photo by D. Sharon Pruitt

I sang this to my son every night when he was a baby, I wrote it just for him. The poem is available on selection of unique gifts

Click on the following link to purchase this poem on a large selection of gifts!

Dream Your Dreams by Rebecca J. Burns

Close your eyes my little one
Close your eyes and dream
You can be anyone,
Anyone you dream
You can go anywhere,
do anything,
meet anyone
Just close your eyes and dream your dreams
Let your imagination take control
Take you on adventures never told
Just close your eyes my little one
Close your eyes and dream with me
You can fly above the mountains
You can swim beneath the sea
Its a great big world before us
Come along and dream with me
You can swing from every tree top
You can conquer every…

View original post 63 more words

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It is amazing the small decisions that can really change your life, your mood, everything.  No matter where you are, there are decisions you can make.  Sometimes we are surviving in the moment and the decision to survive is all we have. If you are in that place today, know that it can change, I am proof of that.

Yesterday my family went off to volunteer at a Triathlon for the disabled.  I did not go as mommy really needed a just me day as I can’t remember the last time I had one of those, if you are able to make one of those happen, do it, even if you can’t have a full day, take what you can get, sometimes an hour or two can change your outlook and mood.

While my family was off doing good in the world, I was home thinking of how I could do good for Rebecca.

I had been struggling recently as I had been on pretty much bed-rest for 4-5 months with migraine associated vertigo, never heard of it, great, you don’t’ want to.

It is basically a thief that slowly steals your life and sentences you to dark rooms, headaches and sunglasses pretty much 24-7 with the bonus of feeling like you are on a very fast merry go round!

The good news is that I was able to return to somewhat of my normal life a little over a month ago but I have not been able to get back any of the focus I had before then.

Most days I was going through the motions of what needed to be done but wasn’t writing which is my biggest passion, of course I was thinking about writing because that is what I do, I think too much and often struggle to get out of my own head.

 

Well today was a different day mentally and I really don’t think this would have happened if I had been surrounded by others, the silence and solitude helped bring out a change.

I slept late because next to writing and my grandson, sleeping is my favorite thing to do.

Not long after being up today I had that normal urge to write, the one I usually push  down as it doesn’t’ seem as important as other things like cleaning the house, but today was different, I put my laptop on my bed and began doing some writing, nothing here just some other projects that began to get the juices flowing.

I hear of writers that don’t know what to write about but I never seem to run out of ideas, I just run out of the follow through to put the words on paper and sometimes to just hit publish.

After a little bit of writing I put Youtube on my tv from my phone, which I love to do and the video I wrote about yesterday that talked about how counting down from 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 can change your life.  The fact that I had gotten the juices flowing and then seeing a video that inspired me prompted the post from yesterday. You have a 5 second window to change your life, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 …

Once I felt I had filled that void I had in me for sometime, I went to the pool where we live, they had just redone this area and put in those large cabanas like at a resort and I was the only one there on a beautiful Sunday afternoon, had there been someone bringing me cold drinks on demand, it would have been Heaven.

Actually it was, I took a nice dip just to cool off then I laid on the biggest bed and spread out.  I listened to Pink and worked on a much needed tan.

Soon after my guy and girl came home, tired as could be.  Unlike me, they worked very hard today, they gave out water and cold towels and assisted those that needed assistance to medical after a long hot Triathlon.

They came home with amazing pictures of people that looked like they had all odds against them but never let it stop them, it was very inspiring.

lady mentor

Back to my reason for writing today, this is now Monday and I was able to get up earlier, get a few things done and sit down here to write this, it may encourage you to take some time to yourself, it may not.

Having that one day to myself yesterday (which did not included chores) has helped to jump start my productivity again, something I have been trying to get back for months.

 

Again, it is the little things that matter and the little decisions that can change your life.  I am all about changing your life by changing your focus and that is so true for me.  You get what you focus on, stop focusing on what you can’t change.

I had often focused on a horrible past as it seemed to have such a strong hold on me as though I had never really gotten free.

Funny as I reread this for errors I wonder if I write all of this just for me, to remind myself of what is important. Writing is an amazing gift to give yourself, it is sometimes like a therapist but much cheaper.

I highly encourage you to write, even if you do not want to share it with the world you can journal privately.

Ladies, it is time to be free, if you are out of the violence and struggling to heal find some rituals that can quickly bring you back to this minute and what you want moving forward.

This was one of the hardest things for me and at times still is today but each day is that fresh start to create the life you want. How that ritual cup of coffee can help you stay Committed & Focused!

I would love to hear what you did or are doing now to get past your past.  What did you do to move forward and heal?  Have you drastically changed your life for the better?  If so, please share your story for others, stories that encourage can change another life.

May you get a few minutes silence and solitude today.

Love & Peace,
Rebecca

I always love when I open the right book at the right time or turn on the TV and one of my favorites things in on.  Well, something like that happened today but I wasn’t even looking.  I love that I can cast Youtube from my phone to my bedroom tv, well today I was doing some work on the computer and I wanted to watch some videos about the stuff I love, blogging, marketing, stuff like that, nothing special, but this filled the silence without having to put on music.  Don’t get me wrong, I love my silence but when doing some tasks, this helps.

After watching a video about blogging suddenly one started to play that I think was titled, The best speech ever, secret to self motivation. It talks about the 5 second rule and no, not the one where if you drop that piece of candy on the floor you can pick it up within 5 seconds, if no one saw you, maybe you have 10.

You_have_5_seconds_to_change_your_life

This was about how motivation rarely works but counting down from 5, 4. 3. 2. 1 can and does all over the world.  I had watched something about this earlier in the year and had implemented it, but then like some habits, I just stopped, but it had been working.

It was like my mojo knew I needed this 5 second rule reminder. Now writing this it reminded me that I used this method when I never heard of as I dealt with major anxiety attacks in the past, I would allow my self 5 seconds to change my thoughts, it always worked. Tips to survive an anxiety attack

Please share below if you have used this countdown method to stop anxiety or improve areas of your life. Normally the simple things we feel won’t work.

I strongly encourage you to watch this video, it may be just what you needed to snap into action for things in your life, this will apply to every single area of your life.  The link is below and I embedded the video so you can save another second, and you better know I am counting down, if you do not click the link to watch withing 5 seconds, you never will.

5 seconds to change your life – best speech ever

Love & Peace,
Rebecca

Dedicated to the Angels of September 11, 2001
Rebecca J. Burns/photo Sharon D. Pruitt

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Heaven must have needed Angels
For so many to have died
Too many went to Heaven
In the blinking of an eye
Flying through the sky that day
When the Heavens opened wide
Heaven must have needed Angels
To make this Nation Cry
What do we tell the children
It wasn’t a bomb
That blew up the world Trade Center
And crashed into the Pentagon
We see it on the news
Cell phones ringing hopeful news
Will Daddy call us one more time
And ask how was your day
What do we tell the children
Daddy’s flight went oh so wrong
He called to say he loves us
Then in a moment he was gone
And along with the Nation
We watched the towers fall
Daddy called to say he loved us
That’s what matters after all
Was it a mistake
Did the pilot lose his way
We have to tell our children
They had hit where they had aimed
Men we do not know who hated US soil
Took people who meant more to us
Than the buildings that they blew
They destroyed a landmark
When they rocked our Nation’s core
But to take away our loved ones
Was to have taken so much more
As you kiss your children goodnight
Midst the rubble and the pain
Tell them mommy or daddy’s in Heaven
Beside them once again

Permission to share this poem granted

Moments that make us look back are often so spur of the moment.  My boyfriend and I picked up my 25 year old son to take him to brunch today,  I am happy that my son that could be hanging with his friends, chooses to hang with us often, I also love that my boyfriend is one of his best friends. This man has been more of a role model and father to my son this is father ever was.

We are driving back after brunch when my son randomly says, it is the 20 year anniversary of my father’s death soon.  I could sense from how he said it so matter of factually like, it might rain later, that he basically feels nothing but a person he should love and care about, died.  This made me so sad yet grateful this man left his life while my son was so young.  Granted the damage of who his father was remained, but I can only imagine the terror he would have brought on my son as he got older.  I feared he would be a teenager being forced to stay the night with an abusive drunk, my son had enough scars having he man in life for just 6 years. I am certain God took the man almost 20 years ago to save my son and I from living the rest of our lives in fear of him.

My son now has a 3 year old son, something he has always wanted.  Funny, he is about to divorce but he had always said, I want a son never a wife.  He so wanted to be the father he never had.  Last week he told me he son said, “daddy, we will be best friends forever.”  My son glowed, as a mother I deeply wish he had this from his own father.

Back today, the man that adores him, my boyfriend of 8 years, took him out to buy him a bike, granted my son is 25, but having a man you respect just take out to get you something you really want, it is just so bonding as a mother to watch.  If anything, the past that we both had has made us both greatly appreciate the good people in our life, my boyfriend being one of the best ones.  My son introduces us to his friends as his mother and stepfather, years ago is was my mom’s boyfriend, this just melted my guys heart.  Today they are unable to find the right bike so they come back home and I see my boyfriend taking his favorite bike out to the truck to send it home with my son, my son liked the bike and since they were not able to find one today, he gave him his.   Just the look of joy on my son’s face made it all worth it.  Knowing someone cares about you enough to give up something they enjoy to see you happy.

There is no point to this writing today except that I knew I wanted to share it with all of you.  There is hope of a better life, for years I have lived waiting for the shoe to drop, but it hasn’t.  My life has been calm and happy, extra happy in the last 8 years having a great man in it and my son so happy.  I need to accept that my life is good and get rid of that feeling that it won’t last.  This keeps me grateful every day for what I have, funny how a bad past can do that for you.  May you find your grateful.

Love & Peace,
Rebecca

Full of Self Esteem

Full of Self Esteem

Hello Beautiful Ladies, Gents Girls and Boys,

This post is for all of you.  The photo above is when my daughter was younger, maybe 5 years old, she was full of confidence and knew she was beautiful, really, she would tell us this all the time and you had to pull her away from any mirror.  Sadly, now that she is about to turn 10, things have changed.

I was watching a talk on www.ted.com, one of my favorites places to learn and educate myself, check it out.  Today I watched a talk given by Meaghan Ramsey, it was about the self esteem and self image of our youth.  It reminded us of when we were little and would kiss our reflection in the mirror.  We loved how we looked, even with red cheeks, drool running down our face  and chubby little legs.  As we age, suddenly we never look good enough and we base how we feel on how others say we look.

This talk hit home for me because just last night my daughter told me with such excitement, “no one has picked on me at school since Monday.”  It was Wednesday.  She has been dealing with low key as I call it normal mean kids at school.  She is almost ten.  She had long hair and really wanted it cut to her shoulders recently.  After months of begging me as I loved her long hair, we let her get it cut.  She was so excited because as a benefit she found out her hair was long enough to donate it to locks of love so that a little girl or boy could have the joy of hair.

She got ready for school the next day, looking a few years older and super confident.  She bounced her new look as she headed off to school.  When I picked her up that day, she was another little girl.  When her sad little face got in the backseat I asked her what was wrong.  She told me that all day long she was picked on and told she looked ugly and that she looked like a boy.  Even her closest friends made fun of her.  My heart just sank for her.

I was always trying my best to teach her it was how she felt about her self that mattered, not the kids in school.  That is easy to say but when your child is devastated as she was, none of that matters.  I consoled her on the way home, empathizing with her feelings and weaving in the reminder that she loved her hair that morning, that she looked older and was always beautiful and that she was deciding how to feel, they were not making her feel that way.  I reminded her that only mean people would make fun of someone because of how they looked and that she was not that type of person and that made her more beautiful than any of them.

By the time we got home she was more confident, as we walked in the house, she was swinging are arms back and forth as we held hands, now swinging her hair back and forth because she loved how it felt, she said to me that those kids didn’t matter, she loved her new hair and they were just mean. This made me happy that she was able to bounce back.

The next few days the mean comments continued, I know in the moment they upset her, but her self esteem was something we worked on at home so she was able to handle it better each time.  She was learning the more she ignored them and continued to swing her hair and smile they seemed to lose interest in picking on her.

I let her know that people will pick on her the rest of her life, not everyone will like her and she will not like everyone.  I let her know that what was most important was how she felt about herself and how she chose to treat others.

This is an ongoing teaching for our children.  We can’t talk about self esteem just one time, it is like doing the math homework we hate or forcing them to read, we must address how others make them feel and how they feel about themselves daily to ensure they grow into confident adults.  It reminds me that she learns from what I say and do too.  I try to look my best and she tells me I am beautiful often, but I am sure she hears comments about my aging face or the fact that I need to drop a few pounds, but we need to be careful of how we model how we look and feel for them.

I did not grow up with the same message as she did, I was the ugly little girl with skinny legs, mad curly hair, I was picked on all the time, as an adult I did not realize the impact that must have had on myself esteem.  This would impact my life as I did not have real confidence in me until late thirties.  When I met my husband, the fact that he thought I was beautiful was enough, then when he beat me down later iwth how ugly, fat and useless I was and that no one would ever want to be with me but him, I was fully brainwashed.  I truly felt that what he said was true.  It took years before I could look at myself in the mirror and not turn away quickly. To read an older post I wrote about being able to see yourself in the mirror after abuse check out this link or search the site (mirror) http://wp.me/p1giU-9y

How do you help your children to be confident to deal with how others may perceive them?  Are you focusing on the entire child?  Imagine if we all looked the same, we could be judged on what we did, how we acted.  It should be this way.  If you teach your children to think this way, they won’t pick on others and they will focus on who they are, not how they look.

Love & Peace,
Rebecca

Rocker Girl

My littler rocker girl

Hello Ladies, Gents and young readers,

Today I just  really wanted to share a few moments I had with my 9, soon to be 10yr old daughter who has decided to sing for school on Monday, she has been singing since she was barely 2 and has the voice of an angel, I know all parents say that, but trust me, would bet my life you will be hearing her someday.  She sings all the time but struggles to sing in front of others, lately she has done better with that but had decided to quit this time because she struggled to learn the words. Ii was like no way lady, if you can’t learn all the words than you read the paper as you sing, everyone will love that voice and will not even notice you are reading some of the words.  This inspired her to keep going.

She going to sing the song from Frozen, not sure but should be called, Let it go as that is often said in the song.  I just sat in awe last night as I helped her practice.  Yes, her voice stuns me but her excitement over that one on one attention meant more to her.  Sing, dance and play with your children, keeps you young and they really feel that love.

What songs do your children sing to you? What dreams do they have that you eagerly encourage?   I don’t remember having an adult inspire me when I was younger or even as an adult, I had to find those things on my own.  What are you doing to be there for your children and yourself?

Love & Peace,
Rebecca
Gifts to Inspire

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