How to “Ditch That Jerk” Steps to remove the wrong man from your life …

This book was suggested to me by a reader on The Last Straw.  She wrote, “This book simply explains what & why & how abuse gets started in family’s. It also goes into detail of the Physcology of these men.”

You can find a copy for as low as $1.00. I encourage you to check it out, it listed around a 25 page preview and I gained much from just that and end lists resources for every state. Many think my man can and will change, this book will help to put that fairy tale to rest. Let me know your review on this book.

Love & Peace,
Rebecca

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A friend’s plea – Get out out of the violence now – before he kills you

I received the following post and since it was so honest and brutal I wanted to start a post on its own so that we can respond back and forth. This is frightening to say the least and sadly, happens everyday.

The post read:
everybody that is still in this type of relationship..please listen to me..please get out as fast as u can!!! i had to watch my very best friend bury her 22yr old pregnant daughter 2 days ago!! her daughter~s boyfriend broke in while she was asleep since she had worked 3rd shift the night before.dragged her outta the bed.beat her head against the concrete wall of the apt then strangled her so hard her throat collapsed! her mom was the 1 who found her when the daycare called &said she failed to pick up her kids,kacy had 2 kids – a 3yr old daughter & a 5 yr old son & a little girl who never had a chance to be born,who since when they done the autopsy found that she was fully developed at only 19wks,it was decided her name would be ‘angel magnolia’ & buried in her mothers arms since it would be closed casket! my bff has had her heart ripped out because of this & her daughter didnt think it was that bad,that things would work out….i am going to do anything i can do to keep another mom from going thru this pain…nobody should ever have to bury their child.much less if it can be avoided to begin with!!! so im begging yall please get out while u can!!!
does anybody know of a site that i can recommend to my friend to go to so maybe she can talk to other parents that have suffered from losing their children to violence that may be able to help her somehow?? i hate seeing her this way & nothing i do or say can help her….thanks soo much & please ladies — get out now!!!!

Readers, can you relate, think it is time to get out now?

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Ntozake Shange, “sorry” aftermath of domestic violence/poetry

The following comment was left for another post and I wanted to share it with you to comment: 2010/09/26 at 6:57 pm

I am survivor. I have been out of the relationship since June 2010. I was hospitalized for the most recent incident in June with a fractured lumbar spine and multiple contusions to my face/head. Two black eyes, both lips fat, broken nose and other numerous bruises over my body. If I didn’t hide in the woods he would have killed me. He is in jail and the trial is starting September 30th. I saw the evidence pictures for the first time 3 days ago. When I saw the pictures of what he had done to me, it became real. Up until then it all seemed like a dream. The court is saying that this is one of the most heinous crimes against another person they have seen in a very long time. As hard as it was to see the pictures, they gave me a sense of empowerment. I do not want to be labeled as a victim, I want to be labeled as a survivor. I am thinking of starting my own blog to share my story and to inform people of the court process & things like that. I am ready to share my story with the world. You may contact me if you would like to at ( i.am.a.survivor1984@gmail.com )

” I will no longer hide these wounds of mine. I will bear them gracefully. They tell a resurrection story.”

Ntozake Shange, “sorry”

one thing i don’t need
is any more apologies
i got sorry greetin me at my front door
you can keep yrs
i don’t know what to do wit em
they dont open doors
or bring the sun back
they dont make me happy
or get a mornin paper
didnt nobody stop usin my tears to wash cars
cuz a sorry

i am simply tired
of collectin
i didnt know
i was so important to you
i’m gonna haveta throw some away
i cant get to the clothes in my closet
for alla the sorries
i’m gonna tack a sign to my door
leave a message by the phone
‘if you called to say yr sorry
call somebody else
i dont use em anymore’
i let sorry/ didnt meanta/ & how cd i know abt that
take a walk down a dark & musty street in brooklyn
i’m gonna do exactly what i want to
& i wont be sorry for none of it
letta sorry soothe yr soul/ i’m gonna soothe mine

you were always inconsistent
doin somethin & then bein sorry
beatin my heart to death
talkin bout you sorry
well
i will not call
i’m not goin to be nice
i will raise my voice
& scream & holler
& break things
& race the engine
& tell all yr secrets bout yrself to yr face
& i will list in detail everyone of my wonderful lovers
& their ways
i will play oliver lake
loud
& i wont be sorry for none of it

i loved you on purpose
i was open on purpose
i still crave vulnerability
& close talk
& i’m not even sorry
bout you bein sorry
you can carry all the guilt
& grime ya wanna
just dont give it to me
i cant use another sorry
next time
you should admit
you’re mean/ low-down/ triflin/ & no count straight out
steada bein sorry alla the time
enjoy bein yrself.

” Do you not know you are God’s temple and that God’s spirit dwells in you? If any one destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him. For God’s temple is holy, and that temple you are”. ( 1 Cor. 3: 16-17)

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